The Saints made more moves this offseason than Lindsay Lohan during her booze induced high-speed chase on the PCH. While most of us ESPN and nfl.com addicts were all over it, some of you may have been too busy watching Butterscotch, the beatboxer/singer spit her way to the final 10 on "America's Got Talent" to keep up with the roster remix. So, here's the cliffsnotes of sorts to get you ready for Sunday's preseason opener.
From Foes to Family:
DT Kendrick Clancy
CB Jason David
LB Troy Evans
P Chris Hanson
TE Eric Johnson
LB Dhani Jones
S Kevin Kaesviharn
DT Lance Legree
K Olindo Mare
DE Anton Palepoi
WR David Patten
LB Brian Simmons
"It's So Hard to Say Goodbye..."
K John Carney (I'm still not over the River City Relay you son-of-a...)
LB Danny Clark
TE Ernie Conwell
CB Curtis DeLoatch
G Montrae Holland
WR Joe Horn (Next time you use a cell phone in the end zone, call your agent...and fire him!)
WR-KR Michael Lewis (Beer Man today, Beer Gut tomorrow)
LB Terrence Melton
S Bryan Scott
S Omar Stoutmire
DL Willie Whitehead
New Kids on the Block:
Robert Meachem, WR
Usama Young, CB
Andy Alleman, G
Antonio Pittman, RB
Jermon Bushrod, OT
David Jones, CB
Marvin Mitchell, LB
Let's Get Ready to Roster!!!
Training Daddy Day Camp
Only two things can keep a dedicated pro-football player away from training camp: a baby and an indictment. Luckily it's the former that will force Saints Running Back Aaron Stecker to miss 5 practices, according to nola.com. Stecker's wife Kara underwent a C-Section to deliver the couple's second child, a baby boy. But baby daddy better hold back on the cigars. He'll need the lung strength come Thursday when he returns to the practice field to fight for a coveted spot on the Saints' roster.
Game Day Chick Tip: The Reason for the Season
Preseason is so close, you can almost taste it. You can see the teams running from the tunnels, smell the sweat of a rookie fighting to prove he can play with the big boys, and hear the roar of fans hungry for some NFL action.
Or perhaps when you think of preseason, the only thing you can picture is yourself bored out of your mind watching hours of games that don't count toward the actual season. The Chicks will now resist the urge to slap you silly for such a notion and offer up a few words of advice to help you survive "the season, before the season."
The "P" Funk: Always remember that preseason has something in common with another "p-word"...playoffs. Both can test the passion of a player, decide careers, and separate the men from the boys. Make no mistake about it, preseason is as much about the plays on the field as it is the players. This is where we get our first glimpse as to who might be playing in the Super Bowl and who'll be watching it with their teammates at home.
Unsolved Mysteries: This preseason has more subplots than the season finale of Grey's Anatomy. How will Joey Harrington step in as the new team leader of the Atlanta Falcons? Will former LSU Tiger Jamarcus Russell go from predator to prey as a Raiders QB? Will this be the season Eli Manning stops being the "Johnny Drama" to Peyton Manning's "Vincent Chase?" These so-called "meaningless" games may not answer these questions, but they'll at least shed light on what we can expect in the months ahead.
Practice Makes Perfect: This isn't just practice time for the teams, but the fans. It's time to see which of your game day superstitions are worth carrying into the new season, and which boil down to little more than a voodoo curse in reverse. Should you continue to wear the one black sock and one gold sock? Does your Joe Horn jersey need to be burned in some cult-like backyard ritual? Will you be forced to lock certain family members in the bathroom during game time since we all know they're bad luck? (Sorry about that mom...)
So you see, there's no need to sleep through preseason. Instead, seize the season! Celebrate the fact that football is back! Sundays will be about Hail Marys in more ways than one! No more marathon movies on Lifetime to pass the time! And best of all, when you get busted drinking a six pack of beer, no one will judge. Afterall, the game was on!
Stallworth-less
The former Saints Wide Receiver dubbed "Street Clothes" because he spent more time out of his uniform than in is living up to his nickname with a brand new team! Donte' Stallworth remains on New England's PUP list (players “physically unable to perform”.) He has yet to show up for training camp.
Stallworth was traded last preseason to the Philadelphia Eagles when rookie Marques Colston outplayed, outlasted and outwitted Stallworth during Saints camp. Sean Payton took that opportunity to vote him off the Saints’ island in Jackson, MS in exchange for Mark Simoneau. Due to a recurring hamstring injury, Donte' went on to rack up some impressive stats in the Eagles "best cheers from the sideline" category.
Patriots Coach Bill Belichick had high hopes this guy would add speed to the team's receiving corp. And we Chicks agree! In fact, we predict no one will out-pace Donte' while he's making burger runs for the players who'll actually get to play.
Who's the 'New Guy?'
Think it’s hard being a rookie at training camp? Try being a new coach. Seven NFL teams hit camp this week under the direction of some fresh meat. And you don’t have to be an expert to know it’s a hard knock life for the newbies, on and off the field.
Instead of being treated like NFL royalty, the coaches get kicked around almost immediately by the local sporting press. Instead of waving signs of support, the fans are sizing them up, trying to see almost instantly what tricks they’ve got up their sleeves. No doubt about it, training camp for a new coach can be about as awkward as the first day of school for a high school substitute teacher who called the honor roll with his fly down.
Here’s a look at just some of what the new team leaders are up against.
Oakland Raiders – Lane Kiffin replaces Art Shell. Kiffin is the youngest coach ever in the NFL. Will GM (as in “General Maniac”) Al Davis suck all of the life out of young Kiffin’s career the way he has sucked all of the success out of his once viable franchise? Or will the youth and exuberance of Kiffin and his new quarterback, JaMarcus Russell, overcome the dark rule of Al and deliver victory once again to the beleaguered Raider nation?
Prediction: Al’s evil spell of ego, age and flawed judgment are impenetrable and Kiffin will go the way of Bill Callahan.
Dallas Cowboys – Wade Phillips replaces Bill Parcells. Few fans outside of Dallas expected Jerry Jones and Bill Parcells to be a match made in heaven but the Big Tuna got flaky much sooner than anticipated. Phillips brings a more mellow approach to coaching that just might help him manage the demands of his irksome boss, the high expectations of Dallas fans and that problematic motor mouth in the locker room known as T.O. If he can juggle all of that, then Phillips should be able to take advantage of the talent he inherits on both sides of the ball.
Prediction: Bum’s boy puts together a winning season and in the NFC that’s usually enough to get you to the postseason.
San Diego Chargers – Norv Turner replaces Marty Schottenheimer. Turner is in the unenviable position of taking over a team that had a 14-2 record in 2006, the league’s best. Do we honestly believe someone named “Norv” with a record of 58-82-1 as a head coach has it in him to keep the Chargers, well, charged?
Prediction: Chargers GM A.J. Smith will be singing an Urkel-esque “Did I do that?” when San Diego finishes the season 8-8.
Miami Dolphins – Cam Cameron replaces Nick Saban. Ah Nick, we hardly knew ye as an unsuccessful NFL coach before you slunk away to the cozy, cash-laden environs of Alabama football. Cameron comes from San Diego where he was a very successful offensive coordinator and very sought after as a head coaching candidate coming off that 14-2 season. He is taking over a team that does not have the likes of LaDainian Tomlinson to power their offense. Both the offense and defense need the addition of some young playmakers for the Dolphins to keep up with the Patriots and the Jets.
Prediction: Miami fans are going to be bitter about Saban for at least a couple of years as they wait for the Dolphins to become competitive again in the AFC East.
Pittsburgh Steelers – Mike Tomlin replaces Bill Cowher. Steelers’ owner, Dan Rooney, is following the recipe that’s made the team successful in the past: hire a young guy with a strong defensive background just like previous coaches Chuck Noll and Cowher. Tomlin takes over a team wanting to prove that their 8-8 record last season was a fluke and that they are still a contender for future Super Bowl rings.
Prediction: Steelers fans will wave their Terrible Towels deep into the playoffs.
Arizona Cardinals – Ken Whisenhunt replaces Dennis Green. The Cardinals are out to prove they “aren’t who we thought they were” and Ken Whisenhunt may just be the guy to help them do it. He arrives from Pittsburgh hoping to work some magic on this downtrodden franchise. He brings with him Russ Grimm who carries some powerful mojo in the form of four Super Bowl rings that he earned as a player and as an assistant coach. They have a lot of weapons to work with on an offense that features Matt Leinart, Edgerrin James, Anquan Boldin and Larry Fitzgerald. And they are playing in a division that doesn’t have a team poised to dominate this season.
Prediction: The Cardinals soar past the Seahawks to win the NFC West.
Atlanta Falcons – Bobby Petrino replaces J.L. Mora. To quote a much more infamous Mora…”Playoffs? Playoffs?!” Petrino shopped himself around quite a bit the last few years trying to escape the University of Louisville. He’s probably missing Louisville now that he’s stepped into a little dog mess in the ATL. There is an upside to his predicament, though. If Petrino can coach the team to a winning season without Michael Vick, he will be a hero. And if he ends up with a losing season, he’s got a really good excuse.
Prediction: The Falcons have no dog in the hunt without Vick and pick top 10 in next year’s draft. And to prove there's no hard feelings, Hollywood Horn is more than welcome to attend our Super Bowl Party in Arizona as we watch the Saints kick some AFC tail!
The Huddle Hottie Watch: 20-16
Our countdown of the top 25 hottest NFL players born within the past 25 years continues. 
#20 Wendell Mathis, RB Minnesota Vikings
Born: 09/28/1983
#19 Chad Owens, WR Tampa Bay Bucs
Born: 04/03/1982
#18 Marquis Cooper, LB Seattle Seahawks
Born: 03/11/1982
#17 Drew Coleman, CB NY Jets
Born: 04/22/1982
#16 Robert Ortiz, WR Seattle Seahawks
Born: 05/30/1983
Who will make the top 15? Here's a hint, a rookie and a Saint both made the cut!
He's Half Football Player, Half Cowboy: What More Could You Ladies Want?
The Saints made it official today with their first round draft pick. Former Tennessee Vols Wide Receiver Robert Meachem signed with the team just one day before the start of training camp. Meachem is best known for his quick adjustments,physical play, and good hands. (Sounds like everything we look for in a man!)
Last year he scored 11 TDs and set a single season record for receiving yards. But let's face it, you didn't come here to get this guy's stats. (That's what NFL.com is for.) The Chicks are taking you outside the numbers and inside the huddle to get to know the Saint's newest addition with a little something we're calling:
It's So Nice to Meachem!
"Giddy? Yup!": Robbie, as his family calls him, grew up on a farm in Tulsa, OK and comes from a family line of Rodeo riders. He's the kind of Cowboy we can actually root for. (You know, not the fumbling or temper tantrum type.) As a small child, Meachem learned to rope young calves.
Sweet as Humble Pie: You can find just as many articles on this guy's speed as you can his humility. In an interview with nflplayer.com, he's quoted as saying
“I really don't watch all the media coverage; my brothers and everybody will call and tell me all that stuff. I never looked at that stuff because I always want to stay humble. It kind of takes away from the guys who pay attention to all that and they just think about themselves."
Not Only Does He Catch, But He Hurls: You've heard of strange pre-game rituals before, but Meachem's may take (and regurgitate) the cake. He's known for taking part in a good upchuck before taking the field, particularly in big games. (Arizona better get the barf bags ready. We wouldn't want to mess up their new stadium come Super Bowl time!)
Family Guy: Meachem is the father of a precious baby girl and has pledged to not pull a Rickey Jackson and be labeled "All-Star Deadbeat Dad."
Bottom Line: Seems like the Saints have wrangled in quite the Cowboy. It'll be interesting to see how Coach Sean Payton blends Meachem into the team's offensive scheme. As for the vomiting, maybe we can convince him to turn his pre-game ritual into an end zone dance! I've always wondered what those glistening Colts jerseys would look like in a chunky orange hue.
#1 with a Bullet
USA Today's pick for the #1 NFL player in the past 25 years is only a surprise to those of you who wouldn't know Barry Sanders from Barry Bonds. Check out the story on what made "Joe Cool" Montana the NFL's top gun.
'Twas the Night Before Saints Camp
Twas the night before Saints Camp and despite all the frenzy,
not an interception was missed, not even by McKenzie.
The jerseys were hung by the chimney with care
in hopes that a Lombardi trophy would soon be there.
Drew Brees was nestled all snug in his bed
with no thoughts of indictments filling his head.
Marques wore his grip glove, Fred Thomas his cast
and pledged “I won’t get burned this year, I’ll be super-fast!”
The backup QBs in their black and gold caps
joked “Let’s ‘pull a Romo’ and fumble some snaps!”
When out on the field there arose such a clatter.
Dhani put down his bow tie to see what was the matter.
Away to the window Copper flew like a flash,
But it was only Joe Horn throwing his career in the trash.
Another loud noise gave the boys quite a fright
…must mean more gunshots in Uptown tonight.
When, what to their wondering eyes should appear
But Coach Sean Payton - and his eyes full of tears.
He unchained a dog once so lively and quick,
saying “Looks like we had another visit from Vick.”
More rapid than Eagles he said this Saints team will be.
And the players all ran to him bursting with glee.
“On Reggie! On Deuce! On Mark Simoneau!
We’re headed to Millsaps, not Thibodeaux!
To I-10 East and to the Twin Spans
Let’s prepare for the season with our Mississippi fans!”
They knew in an instant there’d be a ring this year.
For jolly old Payton made one thing quite clear.
“The gift of winning gives our fans an escape
from shady contractors and FEMA red tape.”
In 2006 they thought it was luck
Now we’ve got to show them we don’t really suck.
Another trip to the playoffs, yes that’s what we crave
and this time we’ll send those Bears back to their caves!
Drew sprang to his feet, got his team all pumped!
“We’re helping the Gulf Coast out of this slump!”
I heard Reggie exclaim as they drove out of sight.
“Enjoy your title now Colts…see you opening night!”
-Dedicated to our fans and our team! Geaux Saints!!
Copyright 2007 www.chicksinthehuddle.com
Game Day Chick Tip: Trips and Clips and Holds…Oh My!
It’s a crucial third down play in the fourth quarter for your beloved team (Go Saints Go!) and as the play unfolds those pesky yellow flags go flying. The referee comes out doing more moves and gestures than the cast of “Breakin 2: Electric Boogaloo.” You’re not really sure what it all means but from the groans in the crowd, you know it ain’t good.
This, my friends, must NEVER happen again. The penalties in football are as important to the game as the actual plays. Penalties can win games lose games and sometimes end games. Knowing the signals and what they mean inevitably help you better understand the game itself.
To help you out, we’ve broken down just a few of the signals of the game. That way, you can save all the “fakin it” for those private moments with your boyfriend.
-If the referee repeatedly moves his right foot behind his left one in a jaunty manner, he’s not gearing up for his “Lord of the Dance” routine at midfield. That’s the signal for Tripping and results in a 10 yard penalty.
-If the talking zebra, aka the ref, rotates his forearms over and over in front of his body like John Travolta’s classic move in Saturday Night Fever, that’s called a False Start and it results in a 5 yard penalty.
-Say a team is backed up on the 2 yard line, the quarterback drops back to pass and is expertly manhandled into the end zone. You’ll notice the ref strike a dashing pose pressing his palms together over his head. He’s just indicated a Safety. That’s two points and a free kick for the team on defense.
Do you hunger for more penalty knowledge? Check out this handy animated rulebook to learn the sign language of the NFL. Before long, you won’t need the crowd to groan to know if something bad happens. Oh and in case you were wondering, that little hand gesture Michael Vick gave his fans last season wasn’t a penalty signal, it was just plain old foul!
The Other Top 25
Now that we've recapped USA Today's list of the top 25 NFL players in the past 25 years, it's time to get "chick-y" with it! Each day, we're revealing our 25 hottest players born over the past 25 years. Sacks and TDs won't count for much in this ranking. To make this completely fair and maintain our professionalism, we based this list solely on looks and in no way considered athletic ability. In fact, the only stats we're comparing are 6 packs vs 8 packs.
Sound shallow? Lil bit, but whatever. Besides, this may be the only top 25 NFL list some of these players will ever see in their careers. And we must say, this assignment turned out to be a lot tougher than you'd think. Let's just say the NFL's 25 and under crowd better step it up!
Now, without further adieu, here are numbers #25-#21 of NFL Hotties 25 & Under:
#25 Jeff Webb, WR Kansas City Chiefs Born: 01/31/1982 
#24 Ryan Fowler, LB Tennessee Titans Born: 05/20/1982
#23 Bill Sampy, WR Philadelphia Eagles Born: 05/10/1983 (Not a great picture but we saw potential.)
#22 Tyrone Culver, DB Green Bay Born: 07/06/1983 
#21 Bruce Gradkowski, QB Tampa Bay Buccaneers Born 01/27/1983
Well, there you have it. And yes, things are off to a bit of a slow start. Maybe #s 20-16 will help us heat things up! Otherwise, this list will do little more than prove we really do watch football because we like the game.
A Lott of Rice in this Brady Bunch
If someone asked you to name the best players in the NFL over the past 25 years, who would make your list? If you're a sarcastic a-hole like me, Aaron Brooks would be tops. But let's say you took the question seriously and dug deep down inside to find the cream of the crop of the NFL since 1982. Tough to narrow down, isn't it?
Well, the folks at USA Today stepped up to the plate to select their top 25 over the past 25 years. While the names may not surprise, some of the rankings are sure to cause a stir. Check it out:
#25 Eric Dickerson, (RB)
#24 Steve Young, (QB)
#23 Terry Bradshaw, (QB)
#22 Rod Woodson, (CB, Safety)
#21 LaDainian Tomlinson. (RB)
#20 Troy Aikman, (QB)
#19 Marshall Faulk, (RB)
#18 Ray Lewis, (LB)
#17 Mike Singletary, (T)
#16 Deion Sanders, (CB)
#15 Bruce Smith, (DE)
#14 Brett Favre, (QB)
#13 Anthony Munoz, (OL)
#12 Peyton Manning, (QB)
#11 Dan Marino, (QB)
#10 Barry Sanders, (RB)
#9 Tom Brady, (QB)
#8 Ronnie Lott, (CB)
#7 Emmitt Smith, (RB)
#6 John Elway, (QB)
#5 Reggie White, (DE)
#4 Lawrence Taylor, (LB)
#3 Walter Payton, (HB)
#2 Jerry Rice, (WR)
#1 ?????
We know, we know...it's the biggest cliffhanger since The Sopranos series finale. But the #1 has yet to be determined. Who do you think it should be? Furthermore, is this list truly an accurate representation of the league's greats over the past 25 years? What about names like Drew Bledsoe? Yeah, he never got the ring, but you must admit he was a relentless opponent. What about Michael Irvin or Jim Kelly or even Randall Cunningham. Should they have a spot in the top 25? And what about any player to ever wear a Saints jersey? (Alright, alright...so maybe we took it too far.)
What we do know for certain is that this list could most certainly have as many fans as it does foes. It'll be interesting to see who gets the top slot. Joe Montana...Joe Theisman...perhaps even 9 time pro-bowler Warren Moon. Who can be certain? What we can tell you is that 25 years from now, names like Reggie Bush, Drew Brees, and Deuce McAllister will be all up in this piece. All that's left to debate is who gets top billing.
Countdown to Camp
For most of us, going to camp signals the start of summertime fun. For NFL players, it's just the opposite. The start of training camp means the party's over, back to work, no more sleeping in late. For some it means no more time spent making the Madden versions of themselves do things they could never accomplish in real life. (That means you Rex Grossman!) For others it means less time to prepare for the next court date.. (The dog-days of summer indeed #7.)
So just what makes camp so kick-ass and worth all the coverage it's getting in the media? For one, it's a chance for us NFL junkies to finally get our fix. We get to see if our draft picks are living up to their potentials, if the old fogeys on the team will get to keep their jobs as starters, and whether our teams made the right offseason moves. And just like the true NFL coaches and GMs, we're sizing up the best picks for our fantasy football squads.
As we prepare for the unoffical start of the NFL season, there are many questions left to ponder.
1) Is it 'game over' for Pacman?
-The Titans cornerback wants in on camp but he's still on suspension for his many, many, many legal troubles. And NFL commissioner Roger Goodell never ruled camp or preseason games off limits.
2) Will this season be Daunte's inferno?
-QB Daunte Culpepper is like the kid in class no one wants on their kickball team. You can't help but feel sorry for him, but you're still not pickin' him!
3) Will Ginn wear the fin?
-#9 draft pick Ted Ginn Jr. has yet to sign with the Miami Dolphins. The kick returner/receiver is expected to report to camp on Sunday.
4) Is the Saints' season "tanked?"
-Rumors are swirling that troubled former bears Defensive Tackle "Tank" Johnson could sign with New Orleans or the Buffalo Bills. Johnson is known for having as many arrests on his stat sheet as he does tackles.
5) Is one infamous falcon preparing for life as a jail-bird?
-While the Falcons are hinting QB Michael Vick will get to take part in camp regardless of his indictment on dog fighting charges, there's no telling what Falcons GM Arthur Blank could decide to do to salvage the team's season before it begins. Many believe Vick will do little more than serve as a distraction. While others can't help but break out in cold sweats at the thought of Joey Harrington leading the Falcons' offense.
Oh yes my friends, this should be the most interesting round of "How I Spent My Summer" book reports since Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan's last lunch date. Stay tuned...
On a lighter note...
Feeling depressed after reading the Vick indictment? Leave it Reggie to make us feel all giddy again!
"Ookie" Indicted: Day 2
You've heard the rumors, you've harassed every Falcons fan in your Rolodex, now click here to read the indictment of Michael Vick in black and white.
Don't feel like it? Let the chicks sum it up:
-First of all, Vick is referred to in the indictment as "Ookie." That's right, Ookie.
-"Ookie", "Q", "P Funk" and "T" are accused of buying the dogs, setting up the kennel, hosting the fights, & sponsoring dogs used in the fights
-Poorly performing dogs were allegedly executed in a way that would make the writers of those "Saw" movies squeamish.
-Female dogs were allegedly subjected to a "rape stand." (We won't describe what that is but we suggest you grab a barf bag before looking it up.)
-The feds site 4 cooperating witnesses as the sources of much of their information.
So what does it all mean? Nothing some say. "He's innocent until proven guilty." Sure he is...
Regardless of Vick's guilt or innocence, the court of public opinion has already tried him and sent the jury home. Sports talk stations got lit up with calls from people urging the NFL to suspended Vick for the entire season. The Humane Society wants endorsers like Nike to kick Vick to the curb. And the PETA peeps are rethinking their position on fur and considering a new coat line made out of 100% Ookie.
Down in the "dirty dirty," some Falcons fans are already erecting statues in backup QB Joey Harrington's honor or pleading for the team to sign Dante Culpepper...quick. Other fans and loyal Vick supporters say nothing should happen unless there's an actual "conVICKtion."
To state the obvious, millions of dollars and the fate of an entire franchise are at stake. Which means no decisions should be made one way or another without reviewing all the facts. But if what's good for the Pacman is good for the Ookie, Vick will no doubt be suspended. (You'll recall the league suspended Tennessee Titans cornerback Adam "Pacman" Jones for the entire 2007 season because of repeated arrests and suspected criminal activity.)
As for what's next, Vick's first court appearance is set for July 26, just in time for the start of Falcons training camp. Legal experts suspect the QB and his lawyers may try to work out a plea agreement to avoid a lengthy courtroom ordeal. And Falcons owner Arthur Blank could announce before week's end how he plans to handle the situation.
Meanwhile, we Chicks wonder how many personalized jerseys with "Ookie" on the back will slip through the cracks before the league catches on.
Dirty Bird Learns His Goose Could be Cooked
Oh Ron Mexico. Remember the simpler times when being accused of spreading herpes was the biggest threat to your reputation? Now it turns out Michael Vick will need more than Valtrex to bail him out of a pinch. Just when we thought the feds were barking up the wrong tree, an indictment handed down Tuesday accuses the Falcons QB and three others of running a dog fighting ring out of Vick's Virgina property. Vick is charged with "dogfighting, procuring and training pit bulls for fighting and conducting the enterprise across state lines." Now that's a dog-gone shame!
The indictment also states that the operation ran under the title of "Bad Newz Kennels." Vick is still swallowing the "bad newz" that he could face up to six years in prison, and $350,000 in fines and restitution. Investigators say the dogs were housed, trained and fought at a Surry County, Virginia property owned by Vick.
According to the indictment, it all started in 2001. Dogs on the property allegedly fought to the death and those who lost were either electrocuted, drowned, hanged, or shot.
Vick is now not only in the dog house with investigators, but with the NFL. NFL spokesman Brian McCarthy is quoted as saying
"We are disappointed that Michael Vick has put himself in a position where a federal grand jury has returned an indictment against him...The activities alleged are cruel, degrading and illegal. Michael Vick's guilt has not yet been proven, and we believe that all concerned should allow the legal process to determine the facts."
The details of the indictment are far too gruesome for these Chicks to stomach, much less repeat. But, for all you sick puppies out there who want more details, click here to get the full story from the AP.
As much as one (as in I) may loathe the Falcons, no one can deny the excitement Michael Vick brings to the game. For the sake of all those kids who look up to him, let's hope these allegations are false. Needless to say, the man we all know as #7 could be sporting a lot more numbers in the near future.
Why Dulymus is Dy-no-mite!
Before chants of "Drew! Drew! Drew!" rocked the dome and countless screams of "Reggie, take your shirt off!" (okay, maybe that was just me), there was one man giving the faithful Saints flock a reason to believe. C'mon, shout it out with me..."DEEEEUUUUCCCCEEE!!!!"
While it was easy for many of us to get caught up in the Reggie hype, Deuce McAllister in rather dramatic fashion made us all remember why he's one of the most respected runners in the league. In case you missed it, he ran for 143 yards and scored 2 touchdowns in the Divisional Playoff Game against the Eagles and carried about 17 lineman (that's right, some of them came off the sidelines to help out) into the end zone. And at the end of the day, he still remains the same 'ole humble guy he's always been since he first donned a black and gold jersey.
What few may know about Deuce is that he didn't exactly get the welcome mat rolled out for him when he joined the Saints roster in 2001. Rumor has it that Ricky Williams really let his "fool flag fly" when McAllister signed on with the Saints, chiding him about his Rookie status and not exactly going out of his way to help McAllister adapt to the team's offensive scheme. Might sound like typical treatment for a rookie, but when it came McAllister's turn to play the big brother role, he did just the opposite. He welcomed Reggie Bush with open arms and went out of his way to make the much hyped draft pick feel right at home.
If for some strange reason you needed any other reason to love Deuce (you cold-hearted robot) feel free to review our list below of "10! Things We Love about Deuce".
#10-In 2003, he became one of only three players in NFL history to record over 190 yards from scrimmage in three straight games
#9- His Catch 22 Foundation funds holiday shopping sprees for hundreds of needy kids each holiday season
#8- While the rest of the crowd is yelling "Deuuuuuce", you can do immature things like yell "boooooobs!" for your own amusement, and fans around you will be none the wiser. (It's only fun after you've had a few beers)
#7-He's got a pair of cheeks that just make you want to squeeze the livin' dickens out of him,
#6-On a cold winter's night in January, he made several Eagles fans contemplate swallowing a bottle of pills
#5-You'll never see him having a "T.O." style temper tantrum.
#4-That oh-so-sweet sounding Mississippi twang!
#3-Seriously, have you seen those cheeks?
#2-Became the first player in franchise record books to surpass 2,000 in a season.
#1-His real name is Dulymus
"And the CHICK-SPY goes to...."
Inspired by last night's ESPY Awards, the Chicks in the Huddle have decided to hand out a few accolades of our own. These awards will cover everything from ESPY memorable moments to fabulous fashions, and even celebrity seat fillers who may have done better for their careers just watching the show from home. So for all those athletes who went home last night empty handed, not to worry. The Chicks just might have your back.
And now, the awards for the 1st ever CHICK-SPYs go to:
For Most Awkward Giggle During an Audience Cutaway: (Tie) Serena Williams and Kevin Durant
Most Out of Place: Jamie Lynn Siegler
Best Display of "The Guns"- (Tie) Regina King & Taryne Mowatt (Winner Best Female Athlete)
Worst Hat/Suit Combo- Samuel L. Jackson (Dwayne Wade was a close 2nd. Better luck next year, champ!)
Most "Where the F You Been?" Celebrity Sighting- Christian Slater
Luckiest Presenter- Regina King, who can now say she was in a Vince Young/Matt Leinart sandwich...without raising an eyebrow
Least Likely to Come Out of this Show with a Record Deal: (Tie) LeBron James for his disturbing take on "My Prerogative" & Macy Gray for... well, you know
Moment that Made Me Giggle Awkardly- LeBron James performing "My Prerogative"
Most Not Awkward Homoerotic Moment- Jimmy Kimmel and Lebron James for the whole "showering together" skit.
Moment Most Likely to Make Me Switch to "Entourage"- Kate Walsh and Peyton Manning for their "witty" banter while presenting the award for Best Female Athlete
The Bobby Brown "Why Aren't You in Rehab" Award- Bobby Brown
Best Fashion Upgrade- Serena Williams
Sharpest Dresser/Team Spirit Award- T.O., who dazzled in a white suit jacket with a shimmering Cowboys star on the back
Most Inspiring Moment- Presentation of Jimmy V ESPY award to NC State Women's Basketball head coach Kay Yow, who battled cancer while leading her team to the Sweet 16.
Best Scar- Drew Brees
Most Likely to Receive a CHICK-SPY Just for Showing Up- Reggie Bush
Best Moment- Presentation of Best Moment to the New Orleans Saints
Congratulations to all of this year's CHICK-SPY winners. See you at the after party!
Game Day Chick Tip: Don't get mad, get Madden
Does this scenario sound familiar: You're at a sports bar cheering for your favorite football team (preferably the Saints) when all of a sudden something good/bad happens and you cheer/curse at the top of your lungs in disbelief. Everyone's screaming with you it seems until out of nowhere, some big shot, big bellied guy starts challenging your knowledge of the game. He throws in a "Do you even know what you're yelling about?" Followed by an oh-so-condescending "You just like the players' uniforms." You attack back with all the stats and figures you know about your team, player names and positions, fun facts and trivia. But then, he throws you a curveball. He asks you about something you've always wanted to learn more about but never really did since, unlike him, you didn't have a chance to play football in school. That's right, the dreaded football formations. And despite all your obvious knowledge of the game, he gets the last word just because you didn't know what it means to be in the Over/Under 4-3 Defense.
At this point you have several options.
Option 1: Break your beer bottle over the table and charge him like a rhino. (Hope you look nice in your mugshot...)
Option 2: Run out crying, confirming all his stereotypes about Chick Fans.
Option 3: Politely suggest he buy a maternity jersey to cover that big gut of his. Then, vow to now get mad, but get Madden.
John Madden is a man many consider to be the Dalai Lama of pigskin. The sportscaster and former NFL coach is one of the most respected men in football. He guided the Oakland Raiders to an overall record of 103-32-7, leading the team to seven AFC Western Division titles and a victory over the Minnesota Vikings in Super Bowl XI. His winning percentage (.750) is the best of any head coach in NFL history. It's no wonder generations of men call upon his wisdom when debating the ins and outs of football with their friends or why they spend hours glued to a controller playing the latest update of his video game.
So, what can Madden do for you? Well, unless you plan on trying out for your local powder puff football team, playing Madden is about as close as you'll get to actually getting in the game. There is no faster way to learn about different formations, how each position affects another, and the best way to defend a certain pass route then to have to come up with all the strategies yourself. Of course, be prepared to get a butt kicking from the computer team you're playing against the first few times out. But before long, you're sure to pick up the formations like a pro. You can also click here to check out other tips on football formations and plays and when they should be used. Then, you can start taking on human Madden buffs, to really get a handle on your coaching skills. Before long, you'll be dropping more formation knowledge than T.O. drops balls!
As for pudgy at the sports bar, don't worry. Your paths will cross again. And after you leave his jaw dropped from your obvious grasp of the game, stump him on a topic he likely knows little about...the female anatomy.
The Big, Easy Draft?
Reggie vs Danica...Battle of the "model" athletes!
"In this corner...Reggie Bush, running back for the New Orleans Saints. He ended his rookie year with 565 rushing yards and 742 receiving yards. He played a crucial role in helping the Saints make their first NFC Championship appearance in franchise history. And he's got a ripped set of abs."
"And in that corner, some racing chick named Danica"
All month long, ESPN will pit headlining athletes against each other to determine the "Ultimate Sports Star." The Ultimate Sports Star will be picked based on the athlete's success both on and off the field along with media buzz and popularity. 32 finalists are squaring off in a single-bracket elimination. Fans and an ESPN panel will vote on the winners of each round until the Ultimate Sports Star is finally decided.
In round one, our own Reggie Bush went up against female racing phenom Danica Patrick. I have to imagine the only reason this wasn't a total blowout is because Danica got the horny guy vote for her spread (and we do mean spread) in FHM. Final results: Bush 72% Danica 27%
Click here to keep up with the daily results of the Ultimate Sports Star challenge. (And don't forget to help our boy Reggie make it all the way to the final round!)
The Pink Falcon in the Room
June 8, 2007
"To Our Season Ticket Holders:This off-season has certainly presented a lot of challenges to us, and we realize it has been difficult for our fans. Therefore, we thought it would be helpful to let you know where we are as an organization.Any time a player in our league – and especially a Falcons player – shows up in a negative light for any act, it is disappointing to us. While unsubstantiated to date, the current public situation concerning Michael Vick puts us in a particularly difficult spot because of the daily attention it is receiving in the media, and our inability to respond because we don't yet have all the facts with which to deal.We hope you understand it would be inappropriate and premature to make any definitive statements or take any action until we know the facts. Therefore, we are awaiting the outcome of the investigation just as you are. For the benefit of our fans, the Falcons and Michael, we hope there will be a quick and clear resolution to this matter so we all can move forward.In the meantime, we want you to realize there are many examples of our organization impacting our community in a very positive manner.We have a large number of players on our football team who go above and
beyond in giving back to our community. For example, this off-season Tight End
Alge Crumpler was one of four NFL players who spent 12 days on a USO tour to
U.S. military bases in Iraq and Afghanistan. Defensive Tackle Rod Coleman,
through his foundation, gave metro Atlanta teenagers a head start on their adult
careers by sending them to a Youth Business Camp....."(Blah, blah, blah...you get the picture.)
Anybody want to join me in pouring a little liquor out for their '07-'08 season?
I Spy an ESPY
Becks meets Bush
Now we know what guys feel like watching girl-on-girl action. Anybody got a cigarette?
A Marques to Marvel
Falcons QB: Free as a bird?
Game Day Chick Tip: What's in a name?
The wrong name could mean the difference between a spirited round of trash talk and little more than a pleasant exchange between football foes. (Bor-ing!) This chick personally finds gratification in picking the most girly/gay sounding team name I can think of. Imagine the delight in knowing the team owner of the "Black and Gold Warriors" will have to acknowledge he got his tail handed to him by a team called "Pink Fairy Princess Rainbows." Doesn't it just make you downright giddy? Below are a few team name suggestions just sissyish enough to keep fellow GMs squirming at the mere thought of facing your squad.
-- Pretty Pretty Princesses (Anthing with "princess" is always a sure bet!)
-- Precious Lollipop Dream Machine
-- Butterfly Candy Kisses
-- Sugar Plum Gum Drops
-- Buttercup Baby Dolls
-- Lil' Ms Lady Birds
-- Precious Pop and the Missy Poo Gang
-- Sugar and Spice Sassy Squad
-- The Razzmatazz Rainbow Posse
-- Jem and the Holograms
I can just see it now...Boy 1: "How'd you do in fantasy this week?" Boy 2: Man, I got beat by "Jem and the Holograms" Boy 1: "WTF??!!!!"
Why do REAL fans wear pink?
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be described as Lipstick Lesbian Barbie's Dream Closet. We're talking pink jerseys, hats, and t-shirts...halter tops, belly shirts, tube tops, and yes, even team logo daisy dukes. (I'll admit it, I own a pair.)
"The pink hat exists for one reason, and one reason only: So that the girls whoOUCH! (FYI, this guy's "grrl" has an ad for Alyssa Milano Mets Jeans on her page and a merchandising section that offers "Mets Grrl" baby tees, but I digress...)
get dragged to the game by their boyfriends have something to wear...The pink is
weak, the pink is boring, the pink is not reflective of most women who sit in
the baseball park."
It takes a Saint to overshadow NFL Sinners
Can Former Eagle Dhani Jones Soar as a Saint?
The linebacker, released by the Philadelphia Ug-les after a less than stellar season in 2006, signed a one year contract with the Saints. Last season, the LB tallied .5 sacks, and 76 total tackles (assisted and unassisted.) And in the categories of forced fumbles, interceptions, and tackles for a loss...well let's just say his stat sheet looks more like Britney Spears' dating history...nuthin but zeroes!
Still, Sean Payton sees something in this 7 year vet that might help take the Saints "D" to the next level. Jones is expected to back up starter Scott Fujita ((or as we like to call him, VA-JITA!!) Jones not only has the potential to add depth to the linebacker corps but he could also fill in the fashion gap left by the departure of Joe Horn. Dhani designs and sells his own line of bow ties.
And let's keep it real, he's easy on the eyes. Alas, these Black and Gold Babes are in it to win it.
So if Dhani isn't pulling his weight come October, the former Eagle can feel free to migrate right back to Chilly Philly. Besides, we've got enough eye candy on the team. (We're talking about you, Reggie!)
A Saint Valentine
He can catch a pass and he sure as hell caught our eye. Now let's just hope he doesn't catch an STD from summer fling Kim Kardashain!
A Saintly Obsession
This site is dedicated to all us chicks who love football just as much as the boys and not just because the players are hot (although it is an added bonus!) Our team of choice, the New Orleans Saints and we're no bandwagon broads. The obsession began long before Reggie suited up, Drew competed for MVP, or Sean Payton won coach of the year. We were there in the brown bag era of the 80s, through the Bobby Hebert years, the Steve Walsh nightmare, Aaron Brooks throwing the ball backwards and somehow repeatedly sacking himself...you get the drift.
But we've vowed not to live in the past for it's the dawn of a new day. We're ready to join in with the rest of the Triple Fs (Female Football Fanatics) cheering on the Saints in their march to the Super Bowl. If you're not a Saints fan, not to worry: trash talk is allowed. Just be prepared to get it back, bigger and bolder. To the fellas, you're more than welcome to stick around too, just keep the patronizing comments to a minimum. After all, we too spot the flags, know the calls, and question the plays. But most importantly, we know you don't have to look like someone's ambiguously gay gym teacher to be a true female sports fan. After all, REAL fans wear PINK!!!
(Oh yeah, Fairweather fans, posers, and groupies need not apply)
