National Foot-Bawl League

Jimmy: "Rogers Hornsby was my manager, and he called me a talking pile of pigshit. And that was when my parents drove all the way down from Michigan to see me play the game. And did I cry?"
Evelyn: "No, no, no."
Jimmy: "NO. NO. And do you know why?"
Evelyn: "No..."
Jimmy: "Because there's no crying in baseball. THERE'S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL! No crying!"

And that's exactly why we're not into the MLB. You see in football, watching a player catch a case of the waterworks is about as common as hearing the prez mispronounce a word. After all, who better than a Chick to relate to raw, uncut emotion.

Take for instance this week's announcement that Deuce McAllister would be out for the rest of the season with a torn ACL. During a news conference, Fullback Mike Karney got choked up while talking about the setback and its impact on his teammate and friend. He even admitted to hugging Deuce and crying after hearing the news. But because we understand the sport and the bond built between these players, we weren't once tempted to question Karney's manhood or brand him a wussy. Who wouldn't weep for Deuce for crying out loud!

In fact, Karney's not the only NFL player known for ballin' and bawlin'. Back in August, former Cowboys wide receiver Michael Irvin went from being coked up to choked up while making his Hall of Fame induction speech. And we're not talking a few sniffles and watery eyes. We're talking a full on Tammy Faye (Bakker) Messner, mascara running, let it out dude, kind of cry.

Then there's Green Bay Packers QB Brett Favre who proved his arm and his tear ducts were still intact after last season's win over the Chicago Bears. Favre got emotional during an interview after the game, leading some to believe he was ready to hang up his jersey for good. Turns out that despite his tears, he was a far cry from leaving the league. And it looks like his team is all the better for it.

Sometimes in the NFL, we witness a little tears for fears. Take for instance when the Bills watched their teammate, tight end Kevin Everett lay limp on the field after taking a nasty hit during the team's season opener. Several players, including punter Brian Moorman, admitted to fighting back tears as they waited for word on whether Everett would be okay. Some of them broke down in the locker room the day after the incident. Within days, their tears of grief turned into tears of joy after hearing news that Everett would likely be able to walk again.

Of course, it doesn't always take tragedy or triumph to get the snot flowing for America's tough guys. Back in 2005, 6-foot-6, 290-pound Miami Dolphins Rookie Manuel Wright showed the toughness of a preteen girl in pigtails when he broke down on the field during practice. What got him so worked up during the workout? Apparently, he couldn't take being yelled at by then Dolphins Coach Nick Saban. Wright had to be escorted off the field by a member of the team's staff as he wiped away tears. (Damn dude, you let 'Little Nicky' break you down? Now that's a crying shame!) So while it's true two wrongs don't make a right, one Wright can most certainly make a very big wrong!

So to sum it all up; Yes, there IS crying in football, and thank heavens for it! These players are real, their problems are real, and their emotions are real. Not all of them see this sport as just a job. Football is their life. And to those out their who'd rather classify them as punks for daring to show emotion in public, do what you must. Just keep in mind that while you're getting your laugh on, these so called sissies are crying all the way to the bank.